Updates From Jane
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Fifth
Tired. Worn. Heavy.
Work is tough. It feels like time is always against me, but thankfully, I’m learning and growing.
Going through the mundaneness and daily grunge of life has made me more aware of the trivialness of my present worries.
Then comes my convoluted thought process: Because I recognize that the failure in the little things isn’t that big of a deal, I’m tempted to get future tunnel vision where I lock my eyes on eternity.
Don’t get me wrong, eternal perspective is good. But the key to eternal perspective is to keep your feet grounded in the present time. Having the hope that this isn’t the end is good, but it’s not an excuse to numb what you’re feeling or going through in the moment…it’s not an excuse to dismiss current responsibilities.
So that’s what I’ve been learning. Treading day-by-day, working through the small seemingly insignificant details, keeping my feet on the ground…but living with a hope in light of eternity.
Tunnel-vision for the now can be disheartening. Tunnel-vision for the future sucks out your life. Living in the balance…that is the trick.
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“Recognizing that every relationship is a mystery to be entered rather than a problem to be solved, may we approach both the presence and all our other connections more intent on wonder than on mastery, more desirous of delight than of decorum, and more concerned with authenticity than with etiquette, to the praise of our wondrously relational God.” — Jen Robbins’ Facebook post -
Fourth
There’s a beggar down inside of me
Standing on the corner of the street
And my shame is my only company
Can use some cash, but can’t admit my need
For what you’ve got and what I could receive
I need you love to come and break the silence
Don’t stop the madness
Don’t stop the chaos
Don’t stop the pain surrounding me
Don’t be afraid, Lord, to break my heart
Just bring me down to my knees, yeah
All I hear is what they’re selling me
That God is love, he isn’t suffering
And what you need’s a little faith and prosperity
But, oh my God, I know there’s more than this
If you promise pain it can’t be meaningless
So make me poor if that’s the price for freedom- Tenth Avenue North, Don’t Stop the Madness
This prayer is so radical. It’s basically asking for heartache. It reminds me of the passage when Paul asks God to take away his thorn, but Jesus assures him and says, “My grace is sufficient for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Oh, the theme of the year.
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Third
I’m re-reading a course pamphlet for fun (the class was THAT good). Here are some quotes from the first chapter that I want to keep in mind as I take steps forward as a journalist:
“Journalism is a joy. Where else can you be paid for stimulating daily engagement in the affairs of your neighborhood, your city, your country, even the world? And your work makes a difference, right from the start.”
“[Journalism] is a delicious invitation to the curiosity, the initiative and the imagination of people who care about the world we live in. That would be you.”
“A journalist must be trustworthy, and must continuously earn trust. Hard to come by, easy to lose.”
And finally:
“There’s the freedom and the satisfaction of everyday, lifelong learning, always exploring, always digging up new stories and formulating new ideas. There’s the satisfaction of working alongside other bright and committed people. There’s the satisfaction of engaging the attention of fascinating — and sometimes repulsive — fellow inhabitants of planet earth. There’s the satisfaction of contributing every day to public knowledge and awareness of things that matter. And there’s the incomparable satisfaction of seeing your name (or face) as the source of good work. Such gratification! You’ll never be bored.”
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Second
I did it. I purchased the Princeton Review’s GRE practice booklet via Amazon.
Wise words from a good friend: I feel like wisdom and knowledge are gifts from God. You don’t have to compromise your efforts to learn in order to be a “better” christian. If he’s given you a love for something, go after it, and try to derive as much fruit as you can get from it.There’s a part of me that always questions whether or not I’m doing God’s will, so I tend not to commit myself completely to things because of this fear (not solely because of this reason, but it is a big factor).I know that God has been cultivating this desire in me to pursue a higher education for a reason. I don’t want to be paralyzed by fear because I know that the whole idea of “living life wrong” is a lie. You make mistakes, you learn and you grow.I know his voice (John 10:27). I’m going to move forward in this truth and trust that he will guide me. Taking steps forward.Edit: Another good word from the same friend: At the end of the day if whatever you do promotes what God has done for you/who he is, you’re “doing it right”.Amen, amen, amen.Edit one mo time: We don’t have to worry about not being “good enough”. He’s never gonna lead us in our lives so that we end up being ashamed of who we’ve become. -
“Lord Birkenhead: Thank God for Lindsay. I thought the lad had us beaten.
Duke of Sutherland: He did have us beaten, and thank God he did.
Lord Birkenhead: I don’t quite follow you.
Duke of Sutherland: The “lad”, as you call him, is a true man of principles and a true athlete. His speed is a mere extension of his life, its force. We sought to sever his running from himself.”— Chariots of Fire -
“It is not the critic who counts;
not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena,
whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood;
who strives valiantly;
who errs and comes short again and again;
who knows great enthusiasms,
the great devotions;
who spends himself in a worthy cause;
who at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement,
and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly
so that his place shall never be with those timid souls who know neither victory or defeat.”— Theodore Roosevelt, Citizenship in a Republic http://design.caltech.edu/erik/Misc/Citizenship_in_a_Republic.pdf -
First
I’m not going to promote this blog on my Facebook or Twitter just cause I want to maintain some level of privacy but if you randomly found yourself here, welcome! I’m going to use this space to dig deep into the depths of life’s possibilities. I’m like a hyperactive dog with the attention span of a goldfish. Everything intrigues me but I never really take the time to dig deeper. So this blog is me grabbing my shovel and digging deep into rich, fertile soil.
Let me know if I don’t make sense. I want to improve on my ability to communicate clearly and effectively. If you judge me for content, drop me a comment. Let’s have a conversation. Conversations are always good.
